Journal 📚 Cats & Volunteers 🐈

[angelbirth]

Sender: Satan
To: Everyone
Subject: Cats & Volunteers

[ In a handwriting that balances on a fine line between neat and messy, the following is written: ]

Hello.

I have two distinctly separate requests, and I urge you to remember that these are separate when you read this.

Firstly, I am looking for a cat. One with a particularly charming button nose, splendid toe beans, and a mewl that could pawsitively melt any heart. While I understand that describes virtually all felines, I thought I'd see if anyone had seen such a cat around.

Secondly—and separately—I am looking for volunteers to participate in a research study. An exceptional candidate would be sturdy and healthy, even better if the candidate has experience overcoming various poisons and toxins. There are risks, such as loss of life, but ideally my research and my own magic-slash-dreamotion energy would prevent death. So ultimately, the risk is minimal. Most likely. Please let me know if you'd be willing to volunteer.

Comments

Sender: Zhao

[seemagicshit]

HAIL SATAN

No seriously, why studying poisons? You branching out into a career or some shit?

Sender: Alastor

[lonelysmiles]

Experimenting with poisons? My, my, somebody's picked up quite the intriguing new hobby. If you'd like, I could let others know during my broadcast this Saturday that you're looking for volunteers.

As for the cat, you'll need to be a bit more specific on the details. All my fishing has led to me gaining quite a few new non-shadowy friends.

Sender: Mammon

[stupidmammon]

Ya know you ain't gotta be all secretive about the cat thing, Satan. it's not like Imma tell you no

An what do you mean you wanna work with poisons???

Sender: Zelda

[multidisciplinary]

You are developing toxins? To what end?

[ Too bad he can't hear her, because there's no judgement in her words. She's genuinely just curious what Satan is working on. ]

sender: REN AMAMIYA

[masqueraid]

Aside from my experience with cats you're already familiar with...

Well, this might sound coincidental, but I just so happen to have exposure to this exact field of study. Maybe I'd be able to help? Depending on what the end result is for...

Sender: Emet-Selch

[recreator]

What manner of poisons did you say you were studying again?

I'd imagine most would prefer some preliminary information before volunteering themselves for your research. Especially when one considers the vast range of potential reactions observed from being introduced to toxins of any kind.

I would also presume these are all sourced from Reverein and the lands that currently surround us?

Sender: Merisia

[likescaves]

That's a tall ask for a volunteer position. Do you really expect people to cooperate with that for little to no return?

Sender: Tenn

[perfectenn]

[ ... Well this isn't awkward at all. And reading those requests together - regardless of instructions - this former bakeneko has valid reason for concern. But, time to cover up that worry with criticism! ]

No one can help you if you describe every cat and cat-like creature in the town.

[mysophobic]

You're...working with poisons?! That sounds really dangerous and you should really have a medical professional around to supervise?!

[ This is not safe at all!!! ]

I can't be poisoned so I doubt I would be useful, but I can help use my powers to purge toxins from people...should anyone actually want to sign up.