dreamcrystals | open 💀 first recording

Entry tags:

open 💀 first recording | passive dream

Sender: Beat
To: Everyone
Subject: Passive Dream Recording
Warnings: Some spoilers for the OG The World Ends With You.

Whenever this time of the year came around, a sense of dread would bubble up deep within him. It would start in his stomach and slowly make its way up to his throat, settling itself there. It was uncomfortable and no matter what he'd do to try to gulp it down, it remained stuck.

This day was no different.

Beat seems to be a few years younger, wearing a slouchy beanie with a skull sewn onto it, his hair pulled back and tucked underneath it. His usual headphones are absent from his head. He’s dressed in a school uniform, but his surroundings do not depict him to be in any such place.

Instead, he wanders Shibuya aimlessly—riding down the streets of Dogenzaka on his skateboard, perusing new albums available in Tower Records, even just hanging out at the convenience store by the Moyai statue. Everywhere but where he was supposed to be.

He reaches into his pocket to pull out his phone, navigating his way to the unread message from someone named “Rhyme”.

Are you coming home soon?

A moment passes before he types up a reply:

ill head home when i feel like it

His message was cold and he knows it deep down. But he sends it anyway, tucking his phone away before he continues loitering about the city.

By nightfall, he finds himself staring up at a modest two-story home, standing just outside its gate. He doesn't know how much time has passed since he's gotten here, but he lets out a sigh, steeling himself for what was to come. The gate’s hinges creak slightly as he pushes it open, a plaque on the gate reading the family name “Bito”.

The lump in his throat still remains.

It isn’t before long that he finds himself standing in front of a Japanese man, dressed in business attire, his tie loose around his neck after a long day at work. To his side sits a rather tall woman with blond hair, an apron draped in front of her dress. He’s filled with dread once again, the pit in his stomach growing larger and deeper as a tightness begins to form in his chest.

Beat reaches out and hands over a card toward them. On it are his grades for the semester. They are well above the passing grade, but nothing spectacular. He knows they’re nothing spectacular. He knows he isn’t anything spectacular. Not in their eyes.

The expression on his face is hard to read as they go over his grades and Beat hasn’t said a single word throughout. His lips remain a straight line and his eyes appear to be downcast. Is it apathy? Is it fear?

He opens his mouth, ready to put himself down, ready to fight them. That’s how it always is after all.

“Good job, son.”

The words catch in his throat before they could leave him. Beat’s eyes widen and his mouth hangs open, staring at them. They look back at him with proud smiles on their faces.

“You did well, Daisukenojo,” said the man.

Beat recoils when he hears the name but doesn’t say anything at first. He continues to stare at them for a moment longer, dumbfounded by the turn of events. “Are you two serious?” he finally asks. His usual manner of speech is missing, but the same inflections and brash tone of his voice remain.

“Of course we’re serious.” This time it’s the woman who speaks, looking back at him incredulously. “You did your best, didn’t you? As long as you do that, we couldn’t be any prouder of you.”

The man stands from his seat and walks to Beat, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Let’s eat out tonight to celebrate, all four of us. How does hot pot sound?”

Beat looks at the man, then the woman. Finally, the surprise on his face disappears and he lets out a laugh. His voice almost cracks when he speaks. “Yeah, hot pot sounds great, dad.”

He hears a quiet ring of a bell nearby. Turning towards the source, he sees a young girl with blonde hair and blue eyes smiling at him, a bell pendant hanging from a leather strap around her neck. He smiles back at her, blinking back the tears that begin to pool at the edge of his eyes.

And then he wakes.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Pre-- Hmm. Well. The message is perfectly understood, and Beat's point has come across, but perhaps another time, he can coach him through spelling.

Not now, though. He's at least socially conscious enough to know when that's a bad idea. ]

I'm glad to hear it, truly. [ By process of elimination, he's guessing "Ribbons" is Aerith. ] It's a relief to know you've had people check in on you already. I know we don't know each other all that well, but let me know if there's anything I can do for you.

I'm doing okay. My wounds have healed for the most part, though there are lingering visions and nightmares.

Are you doing all right on that front?

you checking up on me is huge already yo
you aint gotta do more for me
oris potions helped loads with healing whatever cuts and bruises i got so we all good there

[The mention of visions and nightmares though gives him a bit of pause, the one from the night prior, immediately coming back to him. For a moment, he can't help but wonder if Trahearne had seen it too.]

you been having nightmares too?

[ Good to hear Ori's been by with potions. She's working hard, and it's certainly going to be of benefit for the rest of them, but he just hopes she finds a moment to relax for herself.

This is about Beat, though. The smaller question that appears on the page tugs at him with a little worry. ]

Yes.

You're not alone. There was a lot of nightmare energy in the cave; I would be more surprised if any of us walked away from that without a nightmare or two.

If you want to talk, I'm happy to lend an ear.

[It was harder for him to open up to other people about what he had dreamt the night before. Mostly he tried to shy away from even discussing it and most people seemed to take the hint. But considering what he had gone through with Trahearne and the rest a couple of weeks back, he can't help but debate on whether he should open up about it.]

i dunno but sometimes i still think about what happened in the cave you know
and thinking about what else i coulda done to help yall

[He feels like he didn't do enough. That he could've done more. Especially with the state of how everyone looked when he and Phantom had returned.]

[ It's funny, because Trahearne feels exactly the same way. And time and time again, every conversation he's had with all those who had been present echoed similar sentiments. And each time, they all reassured one another that everyone did their best, that they all did what they could.

And like all of them, he assumes, Trahearne never believes any of it. ]

I know. But your role in assisting Phantom and finding the necklace was crucial. While I admit, the outcome of the fight was not ideal, what you did may have spared us the worst.

[ Not that he really knows what happened during the worst of the fight... He'd been unconscious for most of it. And he really hates that reminder. ]

[Everyone keeps saying that. Aerith even asked him what he would've done instead and even that took him a bit to answer. After everything has been said and done, the "what ifs" still plagued him. But could anyone blame him after the carnage he had seen after the fact?

He writes down the next portion without much of a second thought:]

yeah sure but kitty boy kinda got beat up cause of me too
we still coulda gotten there faster to help yall out

[This was the first time he's mentioned it to anyone but he doesn't offer more than that for now. For Beat, that was just one reminder of how he screwed up back then. Last night's nightmare only drove home just how he would always be a screw-up.]

[ Trahearne knows--he knows this feeling all too well. So well, in fact, that his nonexistent heart aches for Beat, knowing exactly how he feels.

Maybe he needs to go beyond the Eustace incident. Perhaps he needs to reach back and find advice from life to help ease his mind. ]

I understand, Beat. I honestly do. I once commanded an army of my own, and I soon learned that every decision I made meant someone lost their life. The news was devastating each time, and at times I found it hard to keep pressing onward with urgency knowing the weight of my actions. But I could not let their sacrifices be in vain - and so, I learned from my mistakes, and learned to account for unexpected circumstances, so that such things would never happen again.

It's okay to regret and think back on your mistakes, but don't dwell on them. Learn from them, and let them inform your future decisions. Know that action is much better than inaction. You arriving late is much better than you not arriving at all. We all did our part, we learned, and now we are better equipped in case something else goes wrong in the future.

[ Sometimes, in his darkest moments, he thinks of the twenty-three years he spent not doing anything about Orr, and all the lives lost to the Risen in that time. And it's a terrible place to be, mentally. ]

[The length of Trahearne's reply surprises him and it takes Beat a few reads to mull over the advice offered to him. A few years ago, he would've been more reluctant to listen but he has gotten better at it since. He was able to move forward trying to right his own mistakes when it came to Rhyme, and later on with Neku.

He was acutely aware of what he was being told, even allowing him to think about his time with the Twisters back home. Even if Rindo had been the boss man, he knew that his own actions affected the rest of the team. The biggest difference between the Wicked Twisters and the group of people he had allied himself with in Songerein was the amount of people that were directly affected. That was what he was truly struggling with.]

yeah i get that
least the two of us got there before wolfie did something worse and all
but...
look im just pissed that i lost control aight?

[ That he can empathize with, too. Knowing he could have done more somehow, been more prepared if only he had the proper foresight, if he had simply been better... With no outlet, no one else to blame, the anger stews and festers. And it can be dangerous.

But at least Beat is talking about it. Trahearne thinks about his reply for a moment, trying to find the right words that can give him the comfort he needs without belittling his anger. ]

I understand. You're well within your right to be angry.

But I want to understand better. I was not with you while you were gone - could you tell me what happened? Only if you're willing to share, of course.

[That was enough encouragement for Beat to open the flood gates. It had been one of the things that had been bothering him since and now was his chance to spill what had happened at the cliffs.

The words he writes on the journal appear as a messy scrawl, written quickly as to not think twice and talk himself out of it.]

i tried to rip kitty boy a new one while we was getting the necklace cause i thought he was something else
even scored a coupla hits in too

[Phantom was fast, he noticed that when they had fought Eustace and when the two of them ran for the pendant. But Beat was quick in his own right, able to keep up with him, both in speed and in battle. While he had no intention of hurting Phantom, the nightmare energy that lingered at the site and from the first encounter with Eustace had other plans, causing the hallucination.]

[ Trahearne knows Phantom is fast, having fought side by side a couple of times by now. And so, to read that Beat actually managed to hit him tells Trahearne just how fast--or skilled, or possibly both--the human adolescent actually is. He is impressed, to say the least. But a bit conflicted. Because this is Phantom they're talking about--an odd overprotectiveness tugs at him at the thought of him harming his friend. ]

If you thought he was something else, then does that mean the nightmare energy was causing you to hallucinate and lose control?

[ Well. Beat wouldn't be the only one, in that case. Trahearne has literally not spoken of what he saw to anyone else, but that at least makes two of them. ]

guessing that yeah
that's what he was saying too after i snapped outta it

[He recalls how Phantom had to practically knock the wind out of him to bring him back to reality. While it had hurt at the moment, he was glad that things hadn't gotten worse, that it hadn't escalated even further considering there were still some shadow wolves around them when he lost control. The experience made him realize just how much power nightmare energy could actually hold and how dangerous it really was.

There's a bit of time before Beat puts his quill to the paper again.]

thought he was something that took someone important away from me
was hellbent on taking him down because of it

[ Trahearne is about to reply to Beat's first statement when he sees more writing appear. And he patiently waits for him to finish.

That...makes sense. And perhaps offered him the strength and speed to keep up with Phantom. ]

What counts is that you did snap out of it - I am relieved that you had the strength to do so before more harm could be done to either of you. We've seen what nightmare can do.

And I understand. I cannot speak for the others, but for a brief moment I hallucinated Eustace as someone else important to me. I almost gave in to what the vision was telling me - I was equally lucky that I was snapped out of it as well.

You're not alone.

[While he did snap out of it, Phantom had to knock some sense into him to get him to that point. The spot Phantom had hit him was immediately sore afterwards.]

kitty boy had to knock me silly to bring me back
so dunno if that counts
loops flowers probably also helped a bit back there

so you saw something too
thought we was doing aight with that whole nightmare business when we started yo
didnt think it was gonna play dirty like it did

[There's a short pause before he continues.]

thanks
kinda feels good to know that
you okay though?
cause of what you saw and all?

I'm sure Phantom derived no joy from having to beat you. But I'm glad you're both safe in the end.

[ "Kitty Boy" is a good man and he cares deeply, despite what his outer attitude may suggest. Trahearne can't imagine his friend willingly beating up an adolescent unless it was absolutely necessary.

The nightmare energy, it seems, was hard on both of them. ]

I hate to admit it, it I underestimated both Eustace's power and the potency of the nightmare energy. I did not think it would, either.

[ He had been the one warning Beat at the beginning, but it seems that wasn't enough. They'd both been as ready as they could have been, and yet they both fell victim. The regret, a wish he could have done more tugs at him.

The question gives him pause, and the writing stops for a moment, too. Is he okay?

... ]

To be honest, Beat, the illusion brought me elation like I'd never known in my life when it appeared to me. But when I realized it was nightmare using the face of someone dear to me against me, I felt sick. I don't think I've been able to shake the sick feeling since.

[ And. You know. The dreams. ]

[Considering Trahearne had been the one who told him to brace himself going in, Beat had thought that he would've been a bit more prepared about what was to come. Hearing this was a surprise. If only Trahearne could see the look in his face right now, all wide-eyed from this news.]

yo now thats playing real dirty
dunno what i woulda done if what i saw was something like that
think anyone else got an idea?
on how to deal with that sick feeling an all that

[ Trahearne had thought the same, in all honesty.

But it seems he has one critical weakness. ]

I don't know. As hypocritical of me it is to admit, I haven't spoken to anyone about it.

[ Strangely, Beat is the only one who gets to hear this. ]

I hope you haven't experienced the same.

hey you talking to me about it now
and i sure as hell aint no one

[Heh. Even he hears his cocky tone as he writes that down. If anything, it was his own way of telling the other that he would hear them out if they wanted to talk. Or write, whatever.]

even if i dont plan to say nothing people been asking about it
its like they been reading my mind or something

[Last night's nightmare in full view fro everyone to see aside.]

[ Beat is right--the boy certainly is not no one. He is someone, an important someone. It's too bad he can't see Trahearne chuckling on the other side of the journals. And...in a way, it feels good to tell someone.

But he's not too keen on saying any more, so when Beat moves on, he goes along willingly. ]

As time passes, people come to instinctively learn that any sort of emotional or mental stress can spell future disaster. As uncomfortable or awkward as it might be, people will ask. They might not be reading your mind, but it's better to be safe than sorry.

[Trahearne's lucky enough that Beat didn't notice the complete shift away from him in the conversation. His attention span can only do so much.]

they aint?

[If only he was texting. There would've been some confused-looking sticker that would've accompanied what he wrote.]

even if they wasnt doing that it most of it aint been all that awkward
cept wolfie didnt say nothing about it when we got to talking last night

[Hear that? That's the gears in his brain turning.]

I'd say that's a good thing. Even if you don't touch on the most sensitive topics, it's nice to know you're not alone.

And remember that you aren't--you have Eustace, myself, Phantom, everyone else that was there that night. If you ever need anything, do not hesitate to reach out. It doesn't even have to be one of us. So long as you have someone, you should be in good hands.

But if there's anything I can ever do for you, do let me know.

[And that's what he was hearing from everyone else. Those who checked up on him after the incident, those who chimed in after his nightmare. His family situation might not have been something he would talk about opening but even just the company of others helped.

If there was one thing he was sure of, it was that he wasn't alone. Even in this dream world. Though unseen by Trahearne, a small smile finds its way onto Beat's lips.]

i know that yo
kinda hard to miss with all yall checkin up on me

but yeah imma hit you up if i think of anything nightlight
gonna hold ya to that
same thing if you need something from me aight?
beats ya boy

Please, do. I am here for you, Beat.

[ Has he finally taken in a little brother...? ]

And I appreciate the reciprocity. You're a good person, and don't forget that.

[ Why would anyone throw themselves into harm's way to save a stranger, after all? ]

[It's a little odd hearing someone older say that to him. With the way he was usually treated, he had come to expect people to write him off as some punkass kid who didn't know any better.

Taken aback by his surprise, he rereads the words written on the journal a number of times, as if making sure it was real before attempting a reply.]

i wont... thanks yo

[Despite himself, he can't help but smile, strangely proud as he mouths a quiet hell yeah as he closes his journal.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

open 💀 first recording | passive dream

oops lemme go grab another rq

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man, I only realized the broken tag two weeks later lmao mbmb

its ok. i kind of forgive you.

only kind of?

yeah.

... :c

c: ok i forgive u

yay c:

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