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Sender: Ereshkigal
To: Everyone
Subject:

[ There is a strange phenomenon happening with this text entry, what with the header appearing twice. That's because Ereshkigal browsed past entries and figured that she had to write the header herself if she wants to be "Anonymous!" Alas, she is completely unaware her name is in the true sender field for everyone to see. ]

Sender: ANONYMOUS
To: Everyone
Subject: Social Skills

Hello (* ^ ω ^)

Much as I would like to begin by formally introducing myself, I am afraid a most pressing matter led me to pick the quill and put ink on this page. I need assistance with a truly difficult task: engaging in social interactions! (;;;*_*)

I cannot say much lest it reveals my identity, but my line of work is a solitary one that has caused me to become somewhat lacking in what people call "social skills." As such, I believe myself to not be what any sane soul would consider "pleasant" company. Someone as gloomy and evil as myself does not fall under the common conception of a "good person," I am afraid. (｡•́︿•̀｡)

Yet, I very much desire to make friend with as many of you as possible. Unfortunately, mine is a position of such importance, it would be unseemly to openly ask for help when I am supposed to figure out such thing on my own. This is the reason behind this anonymous entry. I realize the suspense behind my identity may be somewhat difficult to bear, and I apologize for any anxiety this might cause you. ｡ﾟ･（>﹏<）･ﾟ｡

I humbly ask that you share with me what wisdom you may have regarding social interactions, so that I may improve and become worthy of friendship and companionship. While I believe this to be a tall order, I shall perpetually strive to improve! Any and all advice are very much welcome. (´｡• ω •｡`)

Thank you for your time. (o^▽^o)

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Sound choices to have, I will tell a staff member about it.

(Anya then proceeds to find a staff member who is at the counter, ready to give them some orders. They soon turn to face her the moment she comes over to pass along the food orders.)

Hi there. I would like to get a burger with fries and iced mocha for myself and a vegetable sandwich and a hot chocolate for my companion over there.

(The staff member dutifully takes the orders into a paper and lets her know that they will deliver it to her and Ereshkigal as soon as they can before handing it to a coworker. Anya returns to the table, looking rather hopeful.)

Okay. They’re going to bring them into our table in a little bit.

[ Ereshkigal sighs in reliefs as Anya takes care of passing the order. It allows her to relax some, as she doesn't have to put her mask up and pretend in front of yet another person. ]

Thank you.

[ She closes her eyes and smiles. ]

You seem to be used to this. [Not all princesses were secluded, heh?] You must have met lots of interesting people in the course of your life.

Oh yes, I have certainly met a lot of interesting people throughout my own life and in my time in Reverin. Some didn’t came from the same status as me, some hail from worlds different from my own and others aren’t from the same species as me.

(When one is friends with a demon, a Sylvari, a sword grandpa, demigods, an Air Genasi, a clone, a hedgehog, and a Erune to name some, things don’t look so weird in one’s eyes for a very long time.)

I didn’t know what to expect in finding friends when I first came here but I eventually made a lot of great friends.

That... That sounds wonderful.

[ She smiled. How fun it had to be, attending parties and celebrations, meeting people from countless worlds and places... She could never do that. The Goddess of Death cannot leave her realm, and so she always sent servants in my stead. And they weren't exactly the talkative kind... ]

It must not feel so different from the usual to you here, does it?

It doesn’t feel too different from what I am used to in my world. I have a lot of different people back home, especially the kids in the orphanage I once stayed in. They’re all very lovely and kind even if they weren’t aware of who I was before I came to stay with them.

Oh, I'm used to taking care of children too. Even if...

[ ... They're the souls of dead children and she cannot understand them.

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ]

Um anyway, I think we needed to be talking about socialization?

Oh right, we should get to talking about how to socialize with people. Perhaps we can start right about now.

(The server then comes in with the food and drink orders for the two of them. Anya thanks them graciously before paying them with some shiny pebbles that she had gathered by the riverside during the town reconstructions.)

[ Ereshkigal gave the server a nod, silently so. But nothing else. She waited till he left to reply to Anya. ]

I've had so little experience... It feels like-like people will judge me for my every words...

Oh yes. That is a sad reality that a lot of people face regardless of where they come from. People can be very judgmental towards certain types or kinds of people and, unfortunately, many won’t bother to open their minds and eyes to the feelings and thoughts of others.

(Anya can relate to this because being the target of the cracky old lady’s wrath for being too different from the other kids in the orphanage and living under a not so great group of people being in charge of her nation for ten years have been very tough.)

But just because that kind of people exist doesn’t mean that there are people who are more open to seeing different perspectives and respecting them at the same time. Papa did tried his best to accommodate to so many people under his rule as much as he could and I think that I and my siblings gained this kind of empathy from him and Mama.

It sounds like you have great parents.

[ She smiled and closed her eyes for a moment. It's too different to really compare, really... But she'd never met her parents. The moment she'd come into existence, she was put in the Underworld and that was it. She'd already been an adult and all, but...

She wonders what it's like to have a childhood. To have loving and caring people help you grow, rather than just appear out of thin air and told to figure it all out on your own. ]

But I... I am a goddess. A queen. People have certain expectations of how one such as me should be. And I... [I want people to like me, is what she wants to say, but she doesn't.] I fail short of those expectations.

(Anya listens well to Ereshkigal’s lament of not being able to fulfill all the expectations she has to deal with as a Goddess of the Underworld. She didn’t say a single word so she can voice out her concerns. Being raised as a Grand Duchess in her childhood, Anya can see similar expectations of being able to fulfill one’s duties as someone placed onto a high social status.

It is really tough to live up to those expectations whether one is a deity or royalty.)

Oh gee, that is pretty tough to fulfill those expectations placed onto you. I’m pretty certain that Papa have encountered similar expectations placed before him and our ancestors before any of us. There is nothing wrong with feeling like you’re not doing any much to curry any favor from anyone despite working hard to get everyone’s approval. No matter how hard we try, there is still some who might think that we’re not trying hard enough.

I too faced similar problems in the orphanage I later stayed in: The cranky old lady thought that I was too odd for an orphan living under her care and, no matter how much I did to not get on her nerves, it was very difficult to get in her good favors. I’m truly sorry that you have to face such high expectations in your world.

Why would someone like that work in an orphanage...? [It sounds weird! You only should do that kind of job if you like all children.] I'm sorry to hear you went through such ordeals yourself.

[ Guess it was the lot for all royalties. In so many of her books, princesses and queens had such wonderful lives, but reality really was something else. ]

I am confident in my work. I do it better than anyone else could. My manners are impeccable too. But... That's not enough. [She took a deep breath.] Gods and mortals alike have ignored me for they fear death. And now that I know freedom, I am at a loss how to interact with people.

Wait, even the gods fear death itself? I honestly thought that only people can have that fear.

(She certainly knows of one undead and vengeful mad man who realized that he was screwed as soon as she smashed his reliquary in Paris. Anya certainly almost choked on her drink at the mere idea of most gods fearing death itself.)

Oh gee. That must be very hard to interact with anyone especially if one is associated with the dead and the Underworld. Let’s see what we can do to help you in boosting your social confidence.

Nothing is eternal. Even gods must die. [Herself included. Though she can't do it till nearly everything else is dead.] Most deities do fancy themselves truly eternal... But even immortals are ultimately mortal.

[ Humans know they will die someday... Gods delude themselves into believing they will not. Some do acknowledge, but most would rather ignore it. ]

The Underworld system I have created nullifies all of their powers and prevents escape. It is perfect. I suppose this is why they are so desperate for mortals to keep worshiping them... [She closed her eyes.] Do you find death terrifying, too?

(Anya is once again not judging her for putting out the inevitability of dying and needing to put a system in her Underworld that will nullify any kind of powers any gods would have so they would be on an equal footing as mortal people like her.

And after realizing how harsh reality can be to so many lives, having lost so many family members, and nearly falling into the sea, Anya has slowly come to accept death as a part of life.)

No quite frankly not at all. Death at this point doesn’t give me any chills. I had lost most of my family at a young age: it was the day many of them lost their lives, including my parents and siblings, that opened my eyes to it. Even many of the kids I met in the orphanage had lost loved ones as well.

I'm sorry...

[ She realizes it's not her fault, but even so... The worst is the death of her siblings. Children. She'd always hated it an to an extent, resented the other gods for not helping humans more. Making it so they would live better lives. ]

Contrarily to what most people believe, I do not have any control over who dies and when. Or rather, I do not make use of my authority to personally enforce death unless special and unique circumstances call for it. [She looked down.] If it was up to me... Children would never die.

Oh dear, that is really sad to hear: not having some way to keep children from dying so soon. It must be hard not to feel sadden by such an early loss. Especially when they have so much time ahead of them to make the most of life and can bring so many hope and dreams with them.

(Having to lose Alexei and a couple of cousins certainly stings her heart so much. She has since started to wonder what he would be like if he hadn’t died on the night the angry mob stormed Catherine Palace and attacked.)

No little child doesn’t have to die a untimely death, including my little brother. He was very much endearing to every one in the family, including my parents and Mama especially. If only I was able to get him to join me and Grandmama in escaping the mobs together, maybe he would have been still alive today.

... Linger not on the past, for it cannot be changed. But look to the future, where a difference can still be made.

[ Ereshkigal had closed her eyes to say that, but smiled somewhat sadly. She genuinely believed humans would be happier if they could let go of the past. If they could blame gods for their misfortunes. But she knows it's not that easy. ]

Of course, it is hypocritical of me to say as I think of the past all the time. But with the short lives that are yours... Reach for the happiness yet to come, not the sorrow behind you.

Oh gee that is some good advice. There have been times where I was wondering if I could have done things differently or fate would have been kinder to my family. That does happen to me from time to time. But you’re definitely right, I can’t wallow over the past and look forward to the future.

Life for a human like me is too short to mourn over the past for too long and there is still time for me to enjoy life and do more things I never thought about doing.

Exactly...!

[ She... sparkles? Ereshkigal is definitely sparkling. A strange phenomenon that sometimes happens when she smiles and is very much happy. ]

The potential you hold within you is limitless. If you want a happy and fulfilled life, you can get it! You just need not linger on the past.

Oh gee thanks. I greatly appreciate the words that you speak, now I’m going to be a lot more motivated in making the best of my time and enjoying life while I still can.

The future is still wide open and I’m not going to wallow in sadness and moruning for the past for too long forever.

Ah, I'm glad I was able to help you...!

[ ... Wasn't that supposed to be the other way around, with Anastasia helping her with her social anxiety? Well, she likes it that way regardless! Far less awkward. ]

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