Happy Birthday, Dork | Backdated to August 31

[crouching_sin]

Sender: Naoya
To: Everyone
Subject: Birthday boy

My cousin, who recently arrived, has a birthday today. Wishing him a happy birthday is encouraged.

He's 18 now after all. In many places that makes you an adult, Kazuya.

Yes, I know you can see me writing this.

Comments

Sender: Kazuya

[belheir]

Thanks, but please don't encourage him.

[untwisted]

Aw, why not? It's okay to let other people celebrate you, and it's okay for you to do it too.

[belheir]

It's not like that. He's doing this specifically to embarrass me by announcing my birthday to the mass public and people neither of us know. So it's a bit weird getting birthday wishes from people I don't know.

Not that I don't appreciate them, but all I can really respond with is "Thanks" and "He's doing this to be an asshole".

[untwisted]

Oh, I'm sorry! I guess it was sort of strange for me to say something, wasn't it?

Still, even if his intent is to tease you, he wouldn't do it like this if he didn't really care about you.

[belheir]

Don't be sorry. It's not your fault you were conned into saying happy birthday to me.

Even if that's the case, he's still a huge jerk. Don't let him fool you into thinking he has emotions.

[untwisted]

I wouldn't really call that a con. It's still your birthday, and people do want you to have a good day.

But everyone has emotions! Whether or not they're actually doing good with them is another matter.

[belheir]

Yeah, I get that. But it's not really something random people should have to care about.

And I can safely say he doesn't. Have any emotions, that is. I've lived with him most my life. Trust me on this.

[untwisted]

But if we care, it's because we want to!

I don't know. I've found that spending most of your life with a relative can lead to some biases, and they aren't always accurate.

[belheir]

I have a friend who would say exactly the same thing I am, you know.

And another one who wouldn't, but he's a traitor to the cause anyway.

[He loves you, Atsuro. But he knows where your programing mentor biases lay....]

[untwisted]

Oh no! To what cause? Have you talked to him about why he did that?

[belheir]

The cause that my cousin is actually a huge jerk who doesn't care about me at all.

And he's a traitor because he sees my cousin through rose coloured programming glasses.

[untwisted]

He must do! He wouldn't have said anything if he didn't.

Another cousin? Is that a bad thing?

[belheir]

No, he's just trying to be obnoxious and make me uncomfortable.

And no, I was talking about my friend who likes Naoya. I don't have any other cousins, at least as far as I'm aware.

[... at least he better not.]

[untwisted]

Sometimes that's someone's strange way of showing you they care, though.

I see. Still, is that really so bad?

[belheir]

Yes.

[untwisted]

Hm. You still call him your friend, so I can't imagine it's a real problem.