journal 🔶 long gone

[noblegarnet]

Sender: Ferran

Have you ever missed someone who hurt you on purpose?

[It'll be good to confirm whether he's alone on that, one way or the other.]

Comments

Sender: Aerith Gainsborough

[inheritedearth]

[The following response comes in flowery, slanted script:]

I guess that depends. What kind of hurt? Even if it was on purpose... was it their choice?

Sender: Maedhros

[holdshisown]

...Yes. Though I know I'd be better off if I did not.

Sender: Naoya

[crouching_sin]

I have. Emotions are complicated, and not always logical.

You don't have to tell me, but what happened?

sender: beat

[stillarhino]

whyd i miss an asshole like that?

Sender: Zelda

[multidisciplinary]

Yes. I miss him every day.

Sender: Yato

[intertwinedfates]

Yeah, for a time. But I got over it and learned there's nothing to be gained from it.

sender: Kazuya

[belheir]

I'd love to miss him, but unfortunately I live with him.

[noblegarnet]

For the sake of simplifying, we'll say emotional hurt, and it was their choice.

[it's not like he's got multiple situations going on or anything nah]

[noblegarnet]

I'm sorry. It would be too easy if you could just turn off those feelings, right?

[noblegarnet]

[uh... where does he start]

We can say I have bad taste in the people I get attached to.

[noblegarnet]

People could have different reasons, I guess. Maybe they believed in someone too much, or they have just as many good memories as bad.

I'm sure it's good that you don't, though.

[noblegarnet]

How long?

[noblegarnet]

I'm glad you've gotten past it. Was there ever a tipping point, or was it just a slow thing?

[noblegarnet]

Oh.

[uhhhh]

I get it, I think. Even if it's not good for either of us.

[intertwinedfates]

It was a gradually process of coming to realize that he didn't really care for me.

Mind if I ask who it is you're missing?

[crouching_sin]

That's fair to say. A lot of people do.

That's not to say it doesn't hurt, but it's at least not uncommon. If that makes you feel any better.

[belheir]

I don't think it's to the point it's unhealthy, but I do think a little time apart might do us good.

[ It's incredibly unhealthy, actually.

Also he's the clingier of the two here. He'll never admit it. ]

[multidisciplinary]

Almost five years.

[ Give or take a century, but mentioning that would just muddle the conversation. ]

Yourself?

[holdshisown]

Very much so, I suppose. I would have been able to avoid much heartache if I could have just made myself stop caring.

sender: lyria

[azuresong]

[ Oh this... hits a little too close to home, especially with the recent absence of said person. ]

I do. I miss them very much...

But people change, and have a change of heart. People make mistakes, and I forgave them.

[stillarhino]

sure they got reasons
but just cause they got good memories or whatever dont mean they can get away with the shit they did

[noblegarnet]

[If a sigh could be transmitted through the journals...]

I guess we wouldn't be [There's a stroke here that's stopped halfway; he almost starts writing "human" but thinks better of it.] people if we could just decide to have this or that emotion.

What makes you miss them?

[Maybe they can focus on the good parts, for a little bit.]

[noblegarnet]

It's mixed feelings, you know. Happy to not be the only one, not happy other people have to suffer the same way.

I guess I just have to hope that some of us learn our lesson, eventually.

[noblegarnet]

Of course not. But recognizing what they've done doesn't always make the feeling go away.

[noblegarnet]

[He guesses he'll stick with the more distant one, though Zelda still has more time on him either way.]

A couple of years, maybe a little longer.

Has it gotten easier to deal with over time, do you think?