0̶2̶

[nulland]

Sender: Rob
To: Everyone
Subject: The Listing

SEEKING: Nemesis
DUTIES: Wronging me, barely thwarting evil plans
HOURS: Varies
PAY: Oh, you will
BENEFITS: You'll be the hero
PRIOR EXPERIENCE: Not necessary. Being easy to hate a plus.

To apply, please contact Rob at here

[ooc: I'm personally not actually looking for him to get a nemesis, so feel free to talk him out of it! But I'll go with it if you don't.]

Comments

Sender: Susato Mikotoba

[judicialassistant]

[ She does not understand the assignment. ]

You want to be wronged? Also... why concoct evil plans if you want them to be thwarted? Why not just make, um, nice plans?

[nulland]

I don't WANT them to, that's just how this works!

[judicialassistant]

You don't want this, yet you are actively looking. Rob, are you quite alright?

[nulland]

Look, no matter what I do, apparently I'm just stuck in this role. And I don't know people here well enough to know who I hate yet so I've been doing nothing for like a month.

[judicialassistant]

Some may call that a vacation. But if that bothers you, you should be looking for something to do yourself. Something productive... not a nemesis for you to fight and antagonize.

[nulland]

I tried that, okay?

[Once. Using his villain skills. Still tried!]

But even in a world that has nothing to do with him, I still ended up being the bad guy. It's easier if I just accept that fact and move on.

[judicialassistant]

Who is "him"?

[ And what does he mean, "he tried"? ]

What happened?

[nulland]

Long story. For both questions, actually. No offense, but I really don't feel like going through the effort of handwriting all of that.

[He has cellphones and the internet back home, this is slow and work.]

[judicialassistant]

No, I understand.

[ If he was hoping that would be the end of that, however, he will be sadly disappointed! Susato is nosy and worries about others. ]

If you are still doing nothing, perhaps I could come find you?

[nulland]

[Nosy and inserting yourself into other people's problems sounds a lot like Gumball, honestly. So please excuse his initial response.]

No.

[Then, after a pause:]

Why? You clearly don't care about having a nemesis if you could even handle that in the first place. Well, I guess you do that fire thing but still.

[judicialassistant]

What?

[ He is excused, if only because Susato is somehow used to the word no. ]

Of course I don’t want to be your nemesis. I just want to talk.

[nulland]

I d

[He pauses, then scratches that out.]

You're the type who's just going to do it even if I tell you I don't want you to, aren't you?

[judicialassistant]

[ Yes. ]

Well I admit it will be difficult if I don’t know where you are.

[nulland]

[Lucky for you, he knows fighting that type only makes things much much worse. It's too bad writing a sigh is really weird because you're missing a great one.]

So that's a yes.

Fine. I'm in the plaza near the board. Was gonna put this up there until I realized this way is easier.

> action

[judicialassistant]

[ Got'em! Susato will have plenty of chances to hear Rob sigh again. For now, her face lights up in a small way. ]

That's not far at all. I will be there in a flash.

[ Though maybe not that fast, honestly. She's on her way there, taking note of the gloomy skies above her, when suddenly she takes a little detour to Dreambucks in a moment of inspiration.

When she appears at the Dream board, it is with two identical drinks in hand. Both are a light-colored pink, topped with ice. She's already sucking the contents of one out of a straw. ]

[nulland]

[Rob is just standing nearby looking like a bored, petulant teenager. He contorts his eyebrow into a questioning look as she approaches with the beverages.]

...Hey. I take it you're thirsty.

[judicialassistant]

I am, but one of them is for you, silly.

[ She is in way too good of a mood to be put off by his... petulant teenager-ness. She holds the cup out to him that clearly hasn't been touched, meanwhile still sipping out of hers with a smile. ]

I thought you might like one in this heat. Try it. It's strawberry and watermelon.

[ And it's fizzy! ]

[nulland]

Oh. Right.

[He glances sideways awkwardly.]

I guess, thanks.

[He'll grab that one she's holding out. Not moving to drink it yet, though.]

So why do you want to talk to me?

sender: REN AMAMIYA

[masqueraid]

What sort of evil plans would be in need of thwarting, under such a position?
I see the hours are marked as varied as well, I hope this means the nemesis would be able to make their own, to some extent?

[judicialassistant]

[ Siiiiip. Susato just tilts her head. ]

Well, you said you didn't want to write everything out.

[ They could have a seat, though? There's a bench nearby that seems to be calling to them from the shade. Susato starts walking that way, urging him to do the same. ]

[nulland]

Mostly plans to destroy you and/or everyone you love. You know, the standard. I got foiled after taking people hostage a couple times too even though that was for the greater good.

Yeah, basically. Sometimes I just show up, sometimes it happens when you decide to cross paths with me. It's definitely easy to live your own life around it like I'm not even there.

[nulland]

[Sure, he'll follow. Again, he knows this type. You have to know when to just give in before they make things horrible. At least that's how it goes with Gumball.

And, since he's begrudgingly walking behind her, he does take a sip! One so far, but it should lead to more. It's pretty good!]

That doesn't mean I wanna talk about it. But I'll admit that it's still easier.

[masqueraid]

Just me? No sights set on destroying the world and / or various degrees of local, national, or global domination?

Are holidays be off-limits? I assume this is an around the clock kind of position, but everyone needs a reasonable amount of days off, am I right?

[judicialassistant]

[ Good. She may be cheating slightly here, because she's seen the effects the drink has on others, but if it happens to help Rob with his turmoil, she won't regret it. ]

Oh, it is. My hand starts to hurt if I use the journal for too long. So...

[ Now she's not. She lets out a sigh as she sits down first. Despite him saying outright that he doesn't want to talk about it, she's still going to encourage him. ]

I am just wondering what brought all this on.

[nulland]

No. It'd be pretty stupid to destroy the world and ruling it sounds like a huge pain. It's probably just a lot of meetings and paperwork. There could be more localized destruction depending on the scheme, though. Also I'm not responsible for what happens to people who get in the way.

Right, but it'll probably feel mostly like time off for you. Basically what I do is plan things and you won't have to stop me until I'm actually doing something. Like, my last nemesis basically just went about his life and his a m a z i n g adventures most of the time with me nowhere in the picture. It took him over a year just to learn my name.