00? ⚘ journal entry

[skyglider]

From: ANONYMOUS
To: Everyone
Subject: Question.

[It's been two weeks, and yet, he cannot stop thinking about it, spinning the word over and over in his mind. His inability to answer, both due to timing and his own speechlessness...

...

It doesn't matter, and yet, it is all-encompassing. And that is why he finds himself awake at approximately 3 in the morning, drumming a pen against the edge of his journal. Finally, an anonymous post appears:]

What is "love"?
How would one recognize it?
Please be as detailed as you like.

[That feels really abrupt, for some reason. Hmm.

...]

Thank you.

[nailed it]

Comments

sender: hiyo

[wwtd]

[ there's something about this that

sort of breaks her heart? (at 3am) as much as it brings into question how she recognizes love and she does not want to unpack that right now!! so, uh, counter question: ]

Anon-san,

Are you asking because you think you love someone but aren't sure? Or are you looking for a perspective that's not your own?

[skyglider]

[oh no that is a good question and he is not entirely convinced he's equipped to answer it--

A few small ink dots appear on the page first. A full minute later,]

Both, perhaps.

[wwtd]

[ both?! hmmmm. ]

Well, okay, then I guess let's start with the first one. [ not because she doesn't know how to answer the second one yet nope ]

How does this person make you feel?

[skyglider]

It's hard to talk about right now.
They left.
When they were here, they made this place feel like home.

[...]

Every place, really.

[wwtd]

I'm sorry, Anon-san. If it's too difficult, you don't have to talk about it.

But I think maybe talking about it will help you figure out your feelings.

It sounds like they were very, very important to you though.

[ a dot of her own appears on the page for a while. longer than a minute. ]

Has anyone ever come back after leaving?

[skyglider]

They were.

[The most important. Something he wished he had been able to say earlier, before it was too late.

...]

Yes. It happens fairly often.
It's complicated, but...this may be a different case.

[wwtd]

[ why? she wants to ask but remembers she's a stranger and truthfully has no right to pry. that and "it's hard to talk about right now" ]

I see. When you feel okay enough to talk about it, Anon-san, please message me again. My name is Hiyori. I don't know how much I can do, but I'll listen to whatever you have to say and do my best.

And about the second thing.

[ who knew that some random message she received at three in the morning would creak open the door she (thought she) so firmly shut and locked on her feelings of love for someone else? someone who wasn't family. someone much more than a friend. ]

I think love is complex and hard to explain in words. It's very beautiful but can also be terrible. For me, I've just always wanted that person to be beside me, though he's been completely insane at times. He drives me crazy. Sometimes, I think something is wrong with me.

[ written very

slowly, ]

I hope that helps.

[skyglider]

I
Ah

[Honestly he's kind of...speechless for a moment, this time not because it's difficult to talk about but because her kindness is so surprising that he doesn't know what to say. He finally settles on,]

Thank you, Hiyori.

[Her description makes a smile flicker over his features, though. It's amusing, sure, but also...perhaps a bit familiar. He knows he can be kind of a weirdo; he wonders if she ever thinks that way about him.

... Thought. If she ever thought that way.]

It does sound familiar, yes. Though I worry that I may be the one between us who is, ah
"Completely insane," as you put it

[wwtd]

[ reading that word of gratitude makes her feel a little better, but you can be sure that the anon-san who was quietly suffering over a love lost will be on her mind for a while.

but then she wonders should I have offered that??! what if he's actually insane?! one insane person is enough to deal with!

... naaaaaaaaaah. her own nervous smile crosses her features as she reads the response. no way, no way. yato is one of a kind. ]

I doubt it. You probably don't put on things like a girl's uniform. Or follow someone wherever they go even when they're trying to ignore you. Or take pictures of someone when they're sleeping. Or wear the same outfit all the time, every day. Or name your scarf "Fluffy Fluff". Or buy and hoard things when you should be saving money. Or

Sorry. I got carried away with examples.

[skyglider]

[Hmm... He reads the description once over. Twice. A third time.

... ... ...]

Of course. No. I would never do any of those things.

[hahahahahahahaha...]

...

To be fair, some of them were necessary.

[oh no he admitted it-]

1/3

[wwtd]

[ haha! yeah! of course not! who would EVER do any of those besides-- ]

[wwtd]

[wwtd]

[ anon-san is insane, too. ]

Could you tell me

which ones

were necessary?

[skyglider]

[... ... ... How is he supposed to explain any of this--]

Ah
Well
It's
I mean

Girls' clothes make a [his writing begins to get more unsteady, because sweet Hylia, now that he's writing it out, it sounds even more insane than it already was] good disguise sometimes, so

[oh no now that he's written it it sounds so bad]

And following someone was...my job.

[...]

It...it sounds worse than it is

[hELP]

1/2

[wwtd]

[wwtd]

[ no you know what

because it sounds SOOO familiar? it's giving her a certain vibe. that anon-san has... good intentions (????) just like someone else.

please.... ]

You wouldn't happen to be god, would you?

[skyglider]

[Something about the way she asks that...sends a chill down his spine...]

Ah.
No?

[He has no idea why he even writes a question mark, just that he has no idea what's going on.]

[wwtd]

[ it is a UNFORESEEN question. to everyone but hiyori.

why the question mark...... ]

A spirit?

[skyglider]

[I mean, yes, he's died twice, but--]

Not that I'm aware of...
Why?

[wwtd]

[ not that... they're aware of... ]

For my own [ sanity ] peace of mind. I guess?

In my experience, gods and spirits are usually a bit more eccentric like that.

[skyglider]

[Peace of mind, huh... It's just a guess, but,] You thought I was someone you knew?

[That would probably have been alarming. He, at least, knows that's certainly not the case. He wonders a moment if he'll have to convince her.]

Ah...I see. It's a little different for me.

[All that stuff isn't really goofy, it's just sad.]

[wwtd]

[ there's always that possibility, isn't there? they're anon. ]

Sort of. [ she's like 90% sure it's not him, anyway. if it is, he's being a REALLY GOOD ACTOR. the other 10% is trying to keep calm.

all the similarities between this person and THAT person are the really alarming part. ]

Different in what way?

[skyglider]

["Sort of?" Hmm...

Ah. Good question. He pauses, trying to figure out how he would word an answer.]

In my world, spirits are people who have passed on.
Most aren't in an eccentric mood.

1/2

[wwtd]

Spirits are people who have passed on where I'm from, too.

[ they're JUST. ALSO. all so different. they were people before, after all. ]

What kind of mood are

[ wait ]

[wwtd]

[ BELATEDLY REALIZING ]

You can see spirits too?!