Audio Broadcast | December 1st

[lonelysmiles]

Good morning, ladies and gentlemen! Thank you for tuning in to 666 AM with me, your host and local Radio Demon, Alastor!

Now, I know what you're thinking: "Alastor! It isn't Saturday yet! You're spoiling us!"

Indeed I am, dear listeners, for I was approached by a very lovely lady who wanted to help get us all in the winter holiday spirit regardless of what specific winter holiday you in particular celebrate! I was so touched by her offer and enthusiasm that I saw no reason to deny her!

With all that out of the lady, do sit back and enjoy the performance of a lady who requires no introduction as she serenades us all!

[The music starts with thirteen tinkling bells. Then a very familiar woman begins singing, and anybody who has been around Reverein long enough realizes just who Alastor is allowing to perform on his station:]

[It's the Siren. She's back again for another year!]

Comments

[lonelysmiles]

[Who said he was? Rude!]

Probably? Well, let's run a little thought experiment, shall we?

[You like experiments, right, nerd? No, he hasn't been sitting on this, ready for someone like you.]

The Siren's song is four minutes and one second long. At sixty seconds per minute, that's 241 seconds total. Multiply that by a thousand, that's 241,000 seconds total listening time before the madness sets in. That's 4,016.66-repeating minutes total. Break that down into hours with sixty minutes per hour, we're up to 66.94-repeating hours. Twenty-four hours in a day, that's 2.78 with a bunch of other nonsense days.

The song was playing for months yet you seem to be still in control of your faculties. And she's been singing to these people for years before our arrival!

[multidisciplinary]

[ One could reasonably argue that Zelda, who has been trying repeatedly to swallow a stone in order to transform into a dragon, is not in full control of her faculties. But the one making such an argument would certainly not be the princess, who spent her adolescence living the dictionary definition of "insanity."

Which she will indulge in again, as what else would you consider arguing with Alastor to be but insanity? ]

And does not the idea of 2.78 full days listening to her song fill you with misery? Even spread out across months, the prospect of hearing a single song that many times is maddening. And moreover, it is entirely possible that I heard it far more than one thousand times previously and that my time away from Songerein has blessedly faded the such an unpleasant memory.

And furthermore, I am certain you will remember as well that there were no people dwelling here when we arrived! Perhaps the siren is the answer to the great mystery of why Reverein lay abandoned when we awoke here—its residents were driven to madness by her song.

[lonelysmiles]

So few people appreciate her music. Such a waste! At least you have taste, my dear!

[lonelysmiles]

A possibility I suppose, but not necessarily the correct one.

Also you're asking someone who experienced a full 365 days of the same song playing over and over again nonstop being broadcast directly into his already-questionable brain with no means of shutting it off or drowning it out. And then it was played regularly but increasingly less over the next 365 days. Almost a full two years of the same song with no hope of reprieve.

By comparison, 2.78 full days of such madness would have been a blessing.

[He pauses for a moment to let that sink in.]

Regardless, I made a deal with the Siren since she kept trying to get onto other programs at the station: I would freely broadcast her singing her song once per year in return for her leaving the rest of the radio station alone for the rest of that winter season. Any additional performances on the radio would only be if she was invited by the person running a particular frequency.

[grandduchess_anya]

Oh I can agree with that fully heartedly. She really deserves a lot more attention for her kind of music without a doubt indeed.

[lonelysmiles]

Patterns, my good fellow, not textures. Like something more floral or maybe more geometric to give two examples.

And frankly my name is more or less synonymous with the radio back where I come from. However, I also enjoy music, largely jazz. Fun to sing and play!

[lonelysmiles]

Precisely! Unfortunately, most people don't see it that way. Can't imagine why when they already listen to trash on the regular.

[lonelysmiles]

Think of it like a more violent version of dreamotion: Emotions can have a strong influence on magic in general given magic -- when you get down to the nitty gritty -- is controlled via will. Strong emotion can heighten one's willpower like determination or anger or weaken it like fear.

Blood is vital to one's survival and comes the closest physically to the core of one's existence and vitality, the soul. It's raw energy in its purest form at that point which makes it an incredibly potent ingredient. As the owner of that blood grows older and begins mixing with others on a more carnal level, powerful emotions to, as the old saying goes, "get one's blood up" can make up the gaps in power when compared to more barbaric practices such as sacrificing newborns who are completely untainted.

It's also the source of many different beliefs surrounding the potency and desirability of virgin's blood in regards to magical creatures.

[localweirdo]

Sounds rather gruesome! Aiyah, that sounds a little too much even for someone like me! Either way, it makes me wonder what kind of world you live in to have such blood magic like that.

Especially when it sounds like if one were to use it wrongly, it could have some terrible consequences. Hopefully that isn't common.

[holdshisown]

Trash?

[Why would anyone listen to music that is not pleasant to hear?]

[a_sweet_little_peach]

Oh, I see -- Patterns, hum... I like hearts, floral patterns work... oh! I don't know if it could work for a pattern of the type you're imagining, but maybe something with this:

[Rather than drawing it out poorly, Ralsei imprints the delta rune onto the page beneath.]

Radio, huh? Got it. I think I've got an idea for you. Apropos of something, you mind giving me the dimensions of your microphone? The, um, cane, too!

[multidisciplinary]

[ On the one hand, that sounds completely outlandish, that a single song would be played over and over again for a full 365 days straight. He must be exaggerating for effect. But on the other hand, Zelda can mathematically comprehend the concept of listening to the same song for 365 days—8,760 hours—525,600 minutes without end. If there's a shred of truth to Alastor's words (and there often is, at least, a shred), then it's no wonder he is the way he is.

So it is, after a moment, that Zelda reads the rest of his response. That pause effectively took the wind out of her sails to continue her argument. ]

Only once this year? So I am safe to assume I shall not wake to her song on your next broadcast as well?

[ Because she trusts Alastor, but only to an extent in situations like this... ]

[lonelysmiles]

[With the radio comes the possibility of people enjoying a particular song to the point where radio stations will play it ad nauseum as the crowd cheers.]

[That isn't to say that Alastor's current mental state was caused by such things, but it certainly didn't help.]

Indeed! And unless one of the other channels invites her onto their frequency, you'll not hear her for the rest of the year on the radio at all. You'll merely have to dread that one performance next winter.

She's not a monster, my dear. She's a performer who loves the winter season and wants to get others into the spirit of it. Unfortunately she only seems to know the one song or at least it's such a favorite of hers that she doesn't want to sing another. A shame given how lovely her voice is. She wanted to perform on the radio for everyone so I worked out a compromise that would give her the chance to do so without it creating an endless loop for the whole season. When making deals -- or, in your case when you become queen, treaties -- sometimes you need to give a little to get what you truly want.

[lonelysmiles]

I don't believe I've met the young lady in question. If she's a companion of yours, I suppose it'll be all rightto invite her.

[lonelysmiles]

Yes. Trash. Bass-heavy, screeching tunes that grate on the ears.

[lonelysmiles]

It's not commonly used nowadays. I believe I'm one of the very few practitioners left but I typically sacrifice my own blood when I make use of it. Unless someone really irritates me.

Why does the rune look like something from Zelda?

[lonelysmiles]

Well, now you have me curious!

[Still he writes down the typical size of the microphone since he can change that at will.]

[mansbestend]

['Young lady'? Oh. Oops.]

She's my flower dog.
People can be weird about dogs so I always try to ask.

[lonelysmiles]

[Oh applesauce.]

[He takes a minute and sighs. Well, he gets along with Aerona well enough. Maybe it won't be too bad...?]

So long as she behaves herself, she's welcome.

[mansbestend]

Fair, man.
She wipes her paws on door mats.
She's really weird but super good.

[lonelysmiles]

If that's the case, then we should get along just fine!

[mansbestend]

Sweet. We'll be there then.

[localweirdo]

...Is that a warning? Should I be worried then?

[holdshisown]

That does sound unpleasant. Very unlike my own peoples music as well. We favor harps and flutes, and don't much like any screeching sounds.

[a_sweet_little_peach]

You'll just have to wait and see!!