dreamcrystals | sixth dream 🌻 the well-worn hair band

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sixth dream 🌻 the well-worn hair band

Sender: Zelda
To: Everyone
Subject: Passive dream recording

This dream is a simple one, focused not on some grand event or terrible disaster, but on a single blue hairband lying innocuously on top of a wooden desk.

Some dreamers might recognize the hair tie as the same type Link wears, but others will think nothing of it. It's just a ratty old hair tie, its fabric worn and discolored with age, its elastic completely stretched out. It's nothing special.

And yet, you gaze upon it with such deep fondness that a wistful sigh slips from your lips.

It's actually very special, this hair tie. It's your own little treasure, rescued from the waste paper bin one afternoon when you spotted it there and then ordered him out of the house. You claimed you needed silence to concentrate on your work, but that was only half true. (But you still made certain to fill the basket with enough crumpled up paper to look like you worked hard in his absence.)

You sit at your desk, resting your chin against one hand, as you idly roll the worn out hair tie between your fingers. For some reason, fidgeting with it helps you think.

But it also helps you to daydream (especially when you hold it up to your nose, because it still smells like his hair).

You loop it around your wrist and lift your hand, watching it dangle loosely like a bracelet. Could you get away with wearing it like this? You've seen other girls wear hair ties around their wrists; surely you wouldn't look so out of place doing that too.

...Except that you've cropped your hair and it's too short to be pulled back into a ponytail, so why would you need a hair tie readily available? Someone is bound to notice that flaw in logic sooner or later.

You shake your wrist vigorously until the hair tie falls off. Then you pick it up again. You flip it back and forth between your fingers. A silly idea intrudes in your mind... No, don't be ridiculous, you're a princess, a woman grown...

And yet...

You loop and twist the hair tie around your ring finger on your left hand, your heartbeat quickening with each loop and twist, until it fits more-or-less snug around your finger. You hold out your hand and spread your fingers, examining the way it looks on your finger...

Goddess, this is silly. You're being silly.

And yet—

A noise overhead startles you, making you jump in your seat. You hear the dull thumping of footsteps above your head, the sounds of someone walking over your subterranean secret place. Quick as a flash, you yank the hair band off your finger and shove it into a box beside your desk. Your heart is racing as you slam down the lid. Silly, foolish, ridiculous! It's just an old hair tie, nothing special. Nothing to get so worked up over.

And yet, you can't calm the flutter in your heart.

A voice—his voice—calls your name from above and it echoes down the well, the entrance to your secret place.

You flatten your hands on the table and take in a deep, shuddering breath, trying to compose yourself. Enough of these fancies. There's no place in your life for them. You have work to do. A kingdom won't rebuild itself!

The dream abruptly ends as you push away from the desk and get to your feet.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Hi it's UN:Somnus.

Luckily, he's only met Link a few handfuls of times, so seeing the worn hair tie doesn't make its owner immediately obvious to him. That may or may not change the more he thinks about it.

And while he normally doesn't prefer to comment on dreams, because they are rather private affairs... he's softened, some. Even he can see her heart is with someone! ]

When the time comes, you must settle for no less than a proper ring. It must be fit for a queen. Your future consort will know this.

[ Sweet Hylia, why. The single saving grace Zelda has been able to count on is that Somnus almost never uses the journals. Whether or not he saw her dream (and since he typically doesn't, maybe he wouldn't), at least she would never know about it.

But no. No. Even that is apparently too much to ask. ]

I shall ensure that Link is appraised of the importance of ring selection should the situation call for it. Thank you.

[ Since it's so obvious to Zelda whose hair tie it is, she just automatically assumes this is the case for everybody who saw the dream. ]

[ .... A H . ]

The knight?

[ Young lady,,, ]

[ ...

........

....

Burying her head face in her pillow and screaming very un-princess-like obscenities. ]

[ It's a noticeable amount of time before Zelda responds. ]

I dismissed him from his service years ago, but yes.

[ Don't you dare, Somnus.... ]

[ A knight in her personal service is already inappropriate enough for a crown princess, as he'd be below her station. But now that he's... not technically one-- ]

Has he other titles to his name?

[ TRYING TO GIVE THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT HERE... Yet Somnus had met the lad in a dream when Link was a child. Nothing back then struck him as being noble-born. ]

[ Really, you're asking if he's titled? Immediately getting defensive... ]

He is a Champion of Hyrule, one of five of the best warriors in the kingdom hand-selected by my father to face the Calamity.

And regardless of that, he is the hero who delivered the kingdom from the Calamity. Any title I could possibly offer to him would be insufficient in return for Link's countless acts of heroism.

[Definitely reading a defensive tone from that, because he's certain Zelda can see where he's going with this--

But before he writes out anything damaging... he recalls their last conversation. He'd told her to live. He hadn't, however, remembered condoning her to abandon her duties entirely. ]

His accomplishments should be appropriately rewarded.

However, an appropriate award would not be to give him your hand. Heroes do not rebuild kingdoms. As heir, that is your responsibility.

[ Clearly he should've thought about what he was going to write for a little bit longer because Zelda positively bristles when she reads his response. ]

Allow me to be quite clear: I am not his reward for saving Hyrule.

You are free to do as you please in this dream, so long as it stays within it. But take caution it goes no further or seeps into your Star. Your duty is to your people, and how to best restore your kingdom. This includes forming alliances by matrimony.

[ He doesn't think he has to bring up how vulnerable Hyrule seems, even to someone from a completely different world. If her kingdom were at its full might, then it would be a different story.... for a second-born or third-born. ]

[ No, he definitely doesn't need to remind her how vulnerable Hyrule is. It's only been her every waking thought ever since Calamity Ganon was defeated and Zelda turned her attention to how to rebuild a kingdom after a century of destruction and neglect. ]

I am quite aware of my responsibilities to Hyrule, but a marriage alliance with one of our neighbors is not an available option.

[ And don't you dare ask her why... ]

[ He's gonna assume "not possible" means something so much worse. ]

For what reason? Do they seek to conquer utterly?

[ Goddess above, have you not punished your daughter enough today? Zelda really, really does not want to talk about the Light Dragon right now. ]

Because there will be no Princess of Hyrule to wed.

[ Please don't make her spell it out. ]

[ And here he thinks of their previous conversation. She had mentioned she made a choice change, permanently, in terms of sacrificing for her kingdom, and he had commended it. At the time, he hadn't taken that to mean... death (which he'd still commend, as one should do for their kingdom and people if necessary).

... ]

How so?

[ It'll be a minute or two before Zelda response, because she forces herself to put down the journal and step away for a minute. She's so worked up at this point that her hands are shaking too much to hold her quill. How did this conversation get so quickly out of hand? She's usually so much more level headed than this.

No, she knows why. It's because of Link. The moment Somnus implied that Link would not be a suitable partner for the princess, Zelda immediately saw red. He has it completely backwards. It's Link who deserves a better partner.

Like someone who will actually be there with him.

After taking a few deep breaths and calming herself down, Zelda picks up the journal again. She doesn't notice the change in privacy, but she will surely appreciate it later. What she does notice is a question she is loath to answer. But she forces herself to do so anyway. (And, deep down, she does want to share this burden with someone else.) ]

The situation is a complicated one so I will spare you the details. But a dire threat looms over Hyrule once more and the only way to defeat that threat [ A pause. She swallows the lump in her throat. ] will be at the cost of myself.

[ Zelda almost leaves it there, but she knows she's still being vague, so she forces herself to continue. ]

There is a forbidden act known as draconification, which can transforms a person into an immortal dragon and imbues them with power beyond any fathomable scale. However, the transformation strips away every aspect of the person who came before and it is completely irreversible. Draconification is considered the highest taboo in Zonai society and to even speak of it is shunned.

This is my only recourse.

[ So this is the true extent of the sacrifice she must make. Permanently changing in a way that strips her of her entire being and humanity. There is no death in that regard, not poetically; as soon she makes the chance, she will know the purgatory of immortality.

She's made that same decision, and although he won't take back commending her for it the sacrifice... How strange. It hurts to hear that she must suffer. Unlike the oblivion death grants, there are such existences that make death the far more merciful option, if not awaiting an end. He would know, having been undying for two thousand years.

But if it means saving the Star, it is worth every countless and harrowing minute of immortality. ]

Should the world demand all, one gives it.

You are strong, Daughter of Hyrule. The choice you made should be honored. May it be honored, by the countless who inherit the future.

[ A second later, he writes to her again: ]

Does he know?

[ Zelda doesn't feel strong. Every time the gaping maw of her eternal sacrifice looms in her direction, she fights with herself not to run away. She knows it is her duty, one that only she can perform, and she is resolute in her choice... but deep, deep down in her heart, she does not want to do this.

She considers closing the journal --she's said what she needed to say, after all-- but those last words appear on the page and she changes her mind. ]

He does, and he has seen the creature I will become.

[ That she refers to this other form of herself as 'creature' doesn't quite sit right. It's degrading to someone of her... everything. Her station, but also her inherent goodness.

There are more questions he suddenly has, but most of them fall at the feet the notion she will live endlessly. Even in Somnus' case, he had eventually been given an end (only to be forcefully brought back to this dream, but that's another story). Perhaps her hero will find a way to grant a merciful end to her, if nothing else. Or perhaps not. Regardless-- ]

If you believe being with him will not make you stray from your choice, [ ...Link is titleless, and Zelda has a duty to her kingdom. Only now neither station nor title matters when she has no future. Somnus is not so cruel to dismiss the obvious conclusion. ] Then, go.

Go and be with him.

Straying from my choice would mean his death as well as Hyrule's. [ She needn't say more than that. It's no choice at all, when she thinks about it like that.

There is a pause, then she puts her quill back to the page. It feels important that Somnus understand, ] But if I were free, I would choose him, so long as he would have me.

[ You are not free. Neither in this draconification process nor your station.

He pens this, then crosses it out. His intent may be to warn of holding such wistful and hopeful notions when her fate has already been sealed (her fate never has been her own, ever since being born into royalty). Because such sentimentality will only bring strife...

But telling her that feels too cruel, and she already knows his stance. ]

I know. [ The fond way in which her dream framed everything, the hair tie around her wrist, then her finger... She is in love, and she dreams of more with the one she loves. It will only be a dream, though. ] But it will not be. Nor would it. [ If she can become an immortal dragon for the sake of Link and Hyrule, he's certain that she would choose to sacrifice loving someone to ensure the political safety and stability of her kingdom. ] Take care of your heart, and ensure that you remember this.

It will make what you have here, in this dream, more precious.

[ It's good that he crosses those words out, because they bring exactly the reaction he fears-- Zelda feels her blood pressure rising as she reads them. But before she can put her quill to the page to pen a retort (because yes, she knows!!!), the offending words are crossed out and new ones appear.

These words are gentler, and though they carry a similar message ("yes, but don't forget your duty"), they are significantly more palatable. In fact, just that little "I know" sticks out at her. It makes her feel... seen.

"Take care of your heart." ] I shall be mindful of that.

[ Again, she pauses as she considers her words. This is the first time in the months that passed since her first kiss with Link that Zelda has attempted to put her feelings into words, or to share them with anyone but him. The princess has always been articulate, but finding a voice for love is like learning a brand new language. ]

I wish to spend the rest of my time here without regrets. I [ a beat ] have never felt this way about anyone before. I do not wish to make any mistakes, or hurt him any more than my sacrifice has hurt him already.

[ ...Reading over her words, it would no doubt be wiser of him to caution her against pursuing a relationship that will never be. By her fate, it is doomed, and either one or both will suffer for it when the dream comes to an end, and has she not committed herself to enough suffering? Or-- "hurt him any more than my sacrifice has hurt him already--" does she not realize to have something so wonderful, only for it to be violently and abruptly excised from one's heart, is equally painful?

He's not sure when he became so soft.

He's not sure when he had begun to wish for whatever happiness she could have in a transient dream. It would be safer if she protected her heart overall. But she is grown, and a part of that "happiness", he supposes, is her choosing to give her heart away-- to accept the consequences of that, too, doomed or otherwise. ]

You are in love.

[ Withholding her heart from what it desires most is probably the cruelest thing Zelda could do to herself. Forbidding herself from exploring and experiencing her feelings for Link would be no protection at all; it would be nothing short of torture. No matter what, she must someday face death (or eternal undeath, as it is), and the only things things that give her strength are the prospect of doing so without regrets and the knowledge that she will at least have the company of her memories throughout the lonely eons she will spend as the Light Dragon.

As she reads those simple words, her cheeks turn pink. He's right, she's deeply in love with Link, but seeing it spelled out so plainly (especially from someone like Somnus), makes her heart flutter in her chest. ]

I am. I think I have been for a long time now.

[ And admitting that in writing is somehow the most exciting and terrifying thing ever. ]

[ She had once told him she'd chosen, with Link, to live in the present. Now he understands the full extent of it, and that, perhaps, she wouldn't have chosen to do so, if it weren't for Link encouraging her or her love for him.

Somnus had also told her to live. He told her to protect her heart. (He's never once told this to any of his own descendants.)

He's certain she understands how it may all end, and if she accepts that-- if both she and Link accept it--... There is nothing more to say. They are seizing an opportunity that would not otherwise be theirs to experience in their home world. ]

I pray you will not suffer for it. May you know only the joy it has to offer.

And when your time has come, may your soul be granted repose.

[ If Zelda didn't know better, she would think she was having this conversation with someone else entirely. She's not known Somnus to capitulate when he doesn't agree with her, and she strongly doubts she has changed his mind on this matter-- and yet here he is, sincerely wishing her well.

It is still surprising to Zelda how much he has changed.

Which is partially what motivates her to pen her next question. Given that the future she faces is not entirely dissimilar from the one he has endured for millennia, it makes her wonder, ] Did you?

[ Did he suffer for love, all those centuries ago, or did he know only its joys? Do his warnings come from experience, as one who has loved and lost? Zelda knows he was once wed and fathered children, but she also knows that not all marriages are made from love-- especially for royalty. ]

sixth dream 🌻 the well-worn hair band

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