໒꒱ 002 journal text

[lemoncandy]

Sender: Anonymous
To: Everyone
Subject: "Before" vs "now"

What do you do if you don't know where "home" is? If no one wants you, and you're stuck here anyway...

I've been thinking about the people I've left behind and keep wondering if I even want to go back. If they'd even really want me back.

I've never really belonged anywhere, and this place isn't all that different, but... at least there's someone who seems to care. But I thought that before, too.

I don't know what to think. I don't know why I'm even writing this.

Comments

[flamberge]

What had made you feel as though you didn't belong in this new place?

As for your father figure, his actions likely speak louder than his words. How does he typically act around you?

[lemoncandy]

No one wanted to spend time with me. No one ate lunch with me, or talked with me about the things I was interested in, or went out of their way to greet me. I didn't have any friends.

He was different. He did all of those things with me. He saved me. ...But I worry it was out of pity, and now that I've caused him too much trouble, he might be in danger. He might have been trying to get rid of me by sending me on an impossible mission.

[flamberge]

If you'd be willing to share a little more about how your father figure treats you and how you've caused him trouble, I may be able to gauge his reasoning for sending you on that mission.