[Open] ♡ 9th Dose ♡ Blow Out the Candles

[itsytitsyspider]

Sender: Angel Dust
To: Everyone
Subject: Another Year to be someone's problem.

Comments

Sender: Angel Dust

[itsytitsyspider]

Why thank you~

What can I say? I'm a spider of many talents.

[book2thehead]

Oh? What other talents might those be, if you don't mind me asking?

[itsytitsyspider]

[Oh boy, wasn't that a can of worms?]

I'm an entertainer of sorts ♡

I can sing, I can dance, I can fight. You name it.

[book2thehead]

[Those are Heizou's favorite cans!]

"Of sorts"? It kind of sounds like you're leaving out the most interesting parts!

[itsytitsyspider]

[....]

How old are ya, kid?

[book2thehead]

["Kid", huh?]

Oh? Are things about to get spicy~?

[itsytitsyspider]

Depends.

This content has an age restriction.

[book2thehead]

Not to worry, then. I turn twenty-one this year!

I'd show you some form of ID, but I don't seem to have that in this dream world.

[itsytitsyspider]

Oh wow. Almost a full fledge grown up.

Well, to put it simply I work in the 'Adult Entertainment Industry' back in Pride.

[book2thehead]

Oh? Will I only be a "full fledge grown up" once my next birthday has passed~?

You keep making it sound like there's so much more to it than what you're saying. Not one to brag, are you?

[itsytitsyspider]

In age only. There a couple other milestone ya gotta do before you're a big boy.

HA! Are ya kiddin'? Hell no. I'm Hell's number one porn star. Its just that the details get a little complicated is all.

[book2thehead]

My my, you're making quite a few assumptions about me based on my age alone~

Hell has its own porn stars where you're from?

[itsytitsyspider]

Oh? Then by all means, correct me if I'm wrong. What other adult activities what you engaged in?

Of course we do. Hell is just a shitter version of the real deal up stairs. It ain't all fire and brimstone. Us sinners are just tryin' to cut out piece of Hell for ourselves to make the most of our afterlife. Some got it better than others.

[book2thehead]

Oh my! That would hardly be appropriate to discuss in a public forum!

Interesting! So really Hell is just a different kind of world within your own world, isn't it?

[itsytitsyspider]

Then I'd be more than happy to take this to a more private setting~♡

Hmm... I guess you can say that. The livin' world don't got a clue we exist. But we know cause we lived it both.

You got an afterlife in your world?

[book2thehead]

Man alive, you are forward! Unfortunately I don't kiss and tell~ ♡

Presumably yes, we do. We certainly have our fair share of ghosts and spirits that cross into the world of the living on occasion... but even then I wouldn't say many of us know much about the afterlife.

[itsytitsyspider]

Who said anything about kissin' and tellin'? I'm a professional 'no kiss n teller'. But your lost kiddo. Don't think you could handle me anyways, Shortcake~ ♡

Hmm... Then there's probably something. But ghost and ghoulies aren't really the same thing as what I am... You got demons?

[book2thehead]

Oh well, what a shame. I suppose I'll just have to come to terms with the disappointment, then!

I suppose that might depend on your definition of "demons".

[itsytitsyspider]

Nah, its probably for the best.

I just saved your life.

I haven't had sex in three months and I'm a horny time bomb. Next poor fool who crawls into my web is going to have their hips snapped in half. This ride aint for newbies.

I don't know... Things that ain't human? Like freakish eight foot tall, yet devilishly sexy, multiple limb spider for a completely random example.

[book2thehead]

Now there's a cause of death I haven't seen before!

[He's laughing about it, though.]

Hopefully you'll find someone to engage you on your level soon enough~

Hmm... There are certainly plenty of monsters around, but I haven't seen or heard of any demons quite like you~!

[itsytitsyspider]

I have heard that is it some people's preferred way to go out.

But hey, if you find yourself lookin' for some cheap easy fun, hit me up Shortcake. I'll take ya out for some drinks~ ♡

Oh hon, I'm one of a kind. Ain't no one like me.

Some what are you? I'm guessin' you're a run of the mill human with how you're talking.

[book2thehead]

I'll be sure to keep that in mind~ ♡

You're right, sadly. I'm just an ordinary human who happened to be fortunate enough to end up in this world of dreams.

[itsytitsyspider]

I'll ya to it~

Then let me ask ya this. If you had the chance, would you rather be something else? Sometimes being a demon isn't all as its cracked up to be. Especially with us sinners. We don't get to choose our forms or powers once we croak.

[book2thehead]

Oh? That's an interesting question.

Compared to all the possibilities that are out there, being a human is certainly the "boring" choice. But I'm perfectly fine with that, to be honest.

Why do you ask? Do you often regret becoming a demon?

[itsytitsyspider]

Are you kidding? Have you seen me? Personally I think its an upgrade from when I was human. People pay big money to come see me~

Though if I were to change one thing, it would be my feet. I.. don't want to talk about 'em.

And maybe more fancy powers... so I don't feel so... powerless?