The Old College Try

[mansbestend]

Sender: Denji
To: Everyone
Subject: i write in the book and people read this???


OK so

I had a genius idea and wanna test sumthin

someone come swing at me. one guy and one girl. kick my ass if you want.

then we go eat or whatever after. i dunno.

Comments

[your_best_friend]

In Kansai...? Well... not me specifically, but there was this thing where me and a bunch of criminals were given incentives to murder each other and try to get away with it without getting caught. That's how I found out you humans didn't really do normal battles.

[What a bombshell!]

[mansbestend]

Uh...huh. You survived by pretending to be another daisy, I bet.

Then everyone you take out turns to fertilizer.

[your_best_friend]

Actually, I didn't kill a single person there. In fact, I SAVED someone from dying. Liv said I might've been the only Zendama there, everyone else Akudama.

The local police station was being raided by the others. I went in to check things out. Someone was trapped under rubble.

* But somebody came.

I was the one that SAVED them. I could have easily killed them and taken their SOUL, but I didn't.

[mansbestend]

Do you... usually kill em and take their SOUL? Ya make it sound like it was a tough choice to make in the rush of stuff.

[your_best_friend]

I admit I had grown bored of mindless slaughter and speedrunning killing people long before I was kidnapped to Kansai.

...

I just thought... "What would Frisk do"? And I SAVED them.

[mansbestend]

Yeah, you uh... should keep that question in your head. Shows you have a heart if you choose to help people instead of... speedrunnin killin' 'em.

[your_best_friend]

[...]

[Flowey should feel touched at the advice. He knows he should appreciate the advice.]

[But nothing happened.]

[Flowey still has a long way to go.]

I had done everything else there was to do beforehand. But... yeah, you're right.

[The game between Flowey and the metaphorical Chara inside of him continues...]

[mansbestend]

I mean, even if you're bored of everything else. Ya might wind up likin' what comes out of it way more than the kill.

[He shrugged.]

[your_best_friend]

I have the power to LOAD to earlier SAVE points. Even if I've seen what the outcome is thousands upon thousands of times play out the exact same way? Buddy, I have the personalities and lines of dialog of the entirety of all the monsters memorized, right down to the slightest deviation.

But I also know that I don't need to RESET anymore. After all, I have the knowledge that other timelines exist! I won't be growing bored for quite a while.

[mansbestend]

Ohhhh... so you're kinda like one'a those nerds that has book knowledge of their favorite game.

I don't think I'd wanna LOAD and SAVE early points, myself. Lotta past shit can stay way back there for all I care. I'm good with a solid run makin' the best decisions I've got.

[your_best_friend]

A solid run making the absolute best decisions and ending with everyone happy? At least six thousand times for me. And then the killing happened and then the speedruns and then me just... observing everything. And then Frisk came.

Determination is a very powerful tool.

Anyways! You must be starving.

[mansbestend]

Six thousand? See, I got you pegged. You're a nerd.

[He jammed his hands in his pockets and nodded to come with him.]

Whadda you eat, anyway?

[your_best_friend]

[OKAY JUST BECAUSE FLOWEY IS AN EXPERT AT COMPUTER CODING AND MECHANICAL ENGINEERING AND HAS EVEN MEMORIZED MEW MEW KISSY CUTIE AND MEMORIZED EVERY SQUARE PLANCK OF THE CORE AND HOW IT OPERATES DOES NOT MAKE HIM A NERD, HOW DARE YOU-]

I don't really need to eat but I can enjoy food whenever. Do you know how to make some spaghetti? If yes, you're already a better chef than someone else I know.

[mansbestend]

[Mhm.]

I've heard of spaghetti, but never had it. Is it good?

[That's not gonna be the first food he'd had named for him that he had never tried, but someday someone will ask him about bread. He knows bread. He appreciates bread, especially turning it into toast.]

[your_best_friend]

If cooked by someone who knows what they're doing, yes. Same goes for any other food. Spaghetti's a noodle if there's any noodle restaurants around here.

[mansbestend]

There's a couple, actually. You want noodles, then?

Might not be spaghetti, but if you're lookin' to wreck a bowl of ramen or a plate of soba, we could do that too.

[your_best_friend]

[Oh, Flowey's familiar with Ramen. Very familiar. And the nerd lizard who eats instant ramen.]

Better not be instant. I mean instant ramen is better uncooked, but fresh ramen beats it any day taste-wise. Lead the way!

[mansbestend]

Way better than instant! Dude's really passionate about noodles.

[He's excited now and moves at a jog. He wants to chow on some hot soup and kick the cold!]

And he puts boiled eggs in it with jammy yolks! You eat like a celebrity!

[your_best_friend]

[Flowey somehow manages to follow along despite being rooted into the ground. Burrowing through the ground with his stem and head sticking out is easy for the flower.]

We'll just wait and see if he's a good a cook as I am~.

[mansbestend]

I'll take you up on that sometime; I wanna know how the hell a flower makes lunch with no hands.

[He grinned and stepped before the stand, gesturing to it with a thumb before having a seat.]

Miso, please. Extra noodles... oh, and an egg!

[your_best_friend]

With vines!

[And once Denji orders...]

Ditto for me!

[The flower remains firmly rooted into the ground. He can't exactly hop up on a seat.]

[mansbestend]

"With vines"... yeah, should have figured.

[So he'd eat with his vines too, he wagered. Dirt in the ramen wouldn't be a complete waste. Just weird. When the order was ready, he took the first and set it on the ground within reach before getting his own.]

Damn, am I glad to see you, noodles. Not a bit of meat in sight, neither.

[He dug right in. The small dizzy feeling he'd been having slowly dissipated. Having saws in the brain made you lose blood pretty quick.]

So which do you like better, that weird black screen stuff or realtime fights?

[your_best_friend]

I'm much, much more familiar with normal FIGHTs. Haven't been in too many realtime FIGHTs. Maybe... like... two or three.

[With that, Flowey nabs some chopsticks and takes a small bit of noodles from his bowl to see how they taste. Aaaaand...]

...Hm! These are actually really decent!

[mansbestend]

Right? I think they got healing magic in 'em or somethin'. I feel better after a bowl.

[C'mere egg. Into the mouth.]

Anyway, I guess I can see the appeal of FIGHTs, take the time to think up a strategy or somethin' instead of goin' on the fly.

[your_best_friend]

The food might be magic food. Monsters never ate physical food and magic food heals you.

[Flowey slurps up another clump of noodles. Yum!]

Yeah, and it's a perfect chance to show off your bullet patterns. You can tell a lot about a monster by looking at them. Just hope someone like me doesn't try to destroy or steak your FIGHT or MERCY or whatever buttons so you're unable to do anything~.

[Immediately after that, Flowey shifts the topic a little.]

The FIGHTS have been like that for a very long time. Monster history books don't say exactly when, but they say it's been that way since before the monsters were sealed into Mt. Ebott.