KACHIIING 003

[stupidmammon]

Sender: Mammon
To: Everyone
Subject: Want a little help?


HEY HEY HEY ITS YOUR FAVORITE HANDSOME MUG, MAMMON THE GREAT~

I heaaaard there was shit cloggin' up the well which kinda sucks right? Like how we gonna make wishes if the well's all plugged up?? Weeeelll~ I decided in my big ol' generous heart~ I would be willin' to do my part. To help. I'd only ask for a favor later on' cause a favor for a favor's always fair doncha think??

I promise ya it'd be in your best interest to get my help~



[ nevermind he's the reason that the well got clogged in the first place... ]

Comments

sender : mei lee

[itsgunnabe_mei]

But since you're fixing it and it would help everyone, wouldn't that mean everyone would owe you a favor?

[stupidmammon]

[ WHY IS IT WHENEVER MEI SEES THINGS HE GETS THIS STRONG FEELING OF GUILT ]

S-see? I'm showin' just how generous I am~!

[itsgunnabe_mei]

[ CAN YOU FEEL HER STARING INTO YOUR SOUL ]

Why aren't you doing it now then? What are you waiting for? Do you need help?

[stupidmammon]

[ He can feel it and it's crushing his very soul!!! ]

W-Well you see!

This is kinda like my way of gettin' others to help. Like motivation you know, like a community project! Make others see an' they'll want to help too!

[itsgunnabe_mei]

Well, I'd want to help anyway, favor or no favor. The well is so important! Everyone has stuff they want from home, even if it's something small, just to make them feel better about being away for so long. Like, when I got back my Tamagotchi, I totally cried forever, because of how homesick I was.

So I definitely want to help out! What do you want me to do?

[stupidmammon]

You got onna those lil tamacreature things? Cute...

[ He might be grinning a little. ]

Well. You got any buckets lyin' around?

Sender: Angel Dust

[itsytitsyspider]

Its a little late for that. I already got my hands dirty tryin' to clean all that crap out.

I have half a mind to find the dimwit who thought it was a bright idea to clog up the well. I still can't make my wish with one of my very real gem thingys.

[stupidmammon]

Hehe.... yeah. Whoever encouraged such a thing was a real asshole, huh?

But, I mean with your log arms, you prolly got so many of those suckers free~

sender: Azula

[itstillhurt]

And I'm sure this unparalleled altruism has only noble motives.

[stupidmammon]

The noblest! I mean everyone here is full of bs pureness and friendship magic right? So it's totally noble!

[itstillhurt]

Indeed.

Most of them are so insufferably convinced of their own nobility, in fact, that they don't feel the need to prove anything quite so aggressively.

[stupidmammon]

[ . . . ]

Damn. You're a lot more clever than some of the others.

[itstillhurt]

[Sir, she knows a load of komodo-rhino crap when she reads it. Also she has trust issues and is suspicious of everybody by default.]

I think you'll find I'm a lot more clever than the majority of people.

Is this just blatant opportunism, or is there some ulterior motive?

[stupidmammon]

A little of both? Honestly I just wanted to get someone off my back, but if I could get something out of this it wouldn't hurt.

[itstillhurt]

Brazen.

But entertaining. Don't worry, I won't spoil your fun.

[stupidmammon]

hehe~ I like you already, Azula I think it said?

There's some gulible people here, I can always get you in on it if you want.

[itstillhurt]

A flattering offer, but I prefer to reserve my cleverness for loftier goals.

[Not that she, uh, had many here.]

[itsgunnabe_mei]

No, but I can get some! How many do you need?

[itsytitsyspider]

Yeah, a real asshole. I know I'm a dick but who would be low enough to offer false wishes? There's a special ring in Hell for that.

Yeah yeah yeah, but I ain't a maid. Whoever made me do manual labor owes me a new suit.

[stupidmammon]

Fair enough. I mean sometimes it ain't fun if its too easy after all. No challenge.

[stupidmammon]

Maybe about like three?

[stupidmammon]

[ Like maybe the greed ring? C-Cough... ]

W-Well ain't no one know who did it an' they ain't even leave any evidence so it's whatever.

[itsytitsyspider]

Yeah, its a damn shame there isn't any way to know whose done it. Lucky for them anyways...

Why aren't you more up in arms about this? This effects all of us.

[itstillhurt]

Exactly.

[Not that fun is really her motivation in most circumstances.]

Besides- if an idea lacks ambition, everybody will try it, and the reward will be diminished.

[Judgmental little thing, isn't she]

[stupidmammon]

While that may be true, you gotta have a certain level of charisma for somethin' like this to work anyway.